Are There Lessons From the Divorce of Katie Holmes & Tom Cruise?

Marriage and divorce keep happening, but generally only the affair of celebrities make news headlines. And since celebrities get so much of publicity in other sphere of their life, even in this bitter experience like divorce news spread. Even in Bollywood, not just Hollywood, there have been cases of divorce, and sometimes we hear accusation of  'spouse snatching' from somewhere. 

Marriage is not something that can be considered a casual affair. Since there is an emotional entanglement in such a relationship, marriage that ends on a sour note will be painful. And more so for children who would be at a loss in such a state of affair. And unless one chooses spouse carefully, the pain of failed marriage can spread.

Katie Holmes was raised as a Christian of some sort till she got married, and Tom Cruise a Scientologist. Christianity and Scientology are different. It is reported that Katie converted to Scientology even as she got married to Tom. It never reports whether her conversion was casual or whether it was a result of genuine conviction that eventually led her to believe that Scientology is after all correct and Christianity has all along been wrong. If she truly is a genuine Scientologist why would she be afraid of her daughter being raised a Scientologist? I am a Christian, and I do want to raise my children as Christians! 

If you are serious about your religion or lack of it, marrying someone of different persuasion can create serious problem. If you are a Christian and your spouse is one not at all interested in your religious outlook,  you will have serious differences of opinion on various issues. Taking children to the church/Sunday school, giving money for missionary work, to involve in leading worship/service or church cleaning, to participate in get together like picnic, to open the house for Bible study etc are going to be some concerns of a Christian believer. And if your partner is least interested in such things, marriage will no longer be something about companionship. Since religious ideology/doctrine plays an important role in our outlook about life, it's important that your spouse shares similar outlook.

Apart from the point mentioned above, marriage also requires communication compatibility. Things that you say should make sense to your spouse or vice versa. Many a time, small issue can create tension. And unless both the couple learns to resolve the matter through proper communication, relationship can break down. If the line of communication is bad, misunderstanding at various levels will creep in. If you are so intelligent, and your would be spouse is an idiot, don't go for it. If you are well educated, and the other person is not, be careful. Education enhances our capacity to be able to talk various things intelligibly. And not being compatible on educational front can be a serious obstacle for a meaningful marriage.

Wait for the right time. Do not get married at a young age when you are financial not independent yet. Having children at a young age can put too much stress on the relationship between the husband and wife. Raising children is not an easy task. It requires brain, energy, money etc.